It's all coming back up on me

So, do you like the mp3 player? (Not the songs, but the player?) I hope so, because I'm going to use it as another type of update from now on. Every two to three weeks, expect a new playlist, and because it only lets me program twenty songs, expect a theme most of the time. The next batch should be up this weekend. It will continue the 2006 retrospective with a completely different batch of tunes, so if you haven't, jam the first set soon. I swear, they're not all as obnoxious as Anaal Nathrakh...

Inspired by Good Little Bad Girl, here's a look at some new-ish music videos that are making the rounds right now. Some are newer than others.


Meat Loaf: "It's All Coming Back to Me Now" - Me and Loaf go way back, to when I was a wily Christian teen metalhead entranced with "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" and, more specifically, its soundtrack. Richard O'Brien was a fucking genius with a good ear and a pop blender stocked with the hallmarks of American youth culture ('50s B-movies and rock n' roll, '60s sexual experimentation and radical chic, '70s glam androgyny and post-hippie pessimism). While Mr. Loaf only showed up to sing a song and get hacked up offscreen by Tim Curry, he remains a big part of the movie's kitchen sink appeal. Plus, I've always been a big Columbia guy, and seeing such a cute, glitzy dame get so hot over a fat slob like Eddie is personally heartening. One time, I learned the Eddie scene for a performance in a local Saturday night cast I palled around with, and the practice time remains one of my fondest teenage memories. I was "Rocky Horror" crazy, I tell you. After digesting O'Brien's songs in many versions - movie soundtrack, "audience participation" soundtrack, original London cast, original L.A. cast, Commodore 64 renditions - I naturally got a copy of Meat's epochal Bat Out of Hell, which I'd always thought had cool cover art but had never actually heard. To me, it was pretty much "Rocky Horror" all over again, rock showtunes pitched somewhere between Elvis Presley and Freddie Mercury. Later, I came to understand that it's actually closer to the stuff Bruce Springsteen was doing at the time, considering the E Streeters who populated the studio band, and that the way-over-the-top songwriting by Jim Steinman was what made it special.

Now, I don't believe in the concept of a guilty pleasure, but if I did, Jim Steinman would be at the top of the list. His devotion to bombastic, blowing-the-goddamned-roof-off-an-opera-house grandeur comes second only to Blind Guardian's, and although his career has been much more pop oriented, I hope that some day Steinman and Guardian will find each other and collaborate on what would surely be the loudest power metal album EVER. Pink would also be an interesting match, since Steinman tends to work with female vocalists with rough voices and she's the rulin'est. As for Mr. Loaf, since Bat he's made two more albums with Steinman, the delayed and ultimately unloved Bat follow-up Dead Ringer and the comeback megahit Bat Out of Hell II: Back Into Hell, where Meat capably floated on a bloated blend of forced L.A. hard rock and adult contemporary pop. But all but one of the other records he's made has had at least one Steinman composition on it. In fact, over the years he's been slowly re-recording all of Bad for Good, the album originally written to follow the first Bat but which became Steinman's (thankfully) only solo platter, as well as the flop Pandora's Box album that Steinman masterminded in 1989. So, after years of VH1 suckery, Meat released Bat Out of Hell III: The Monster Is Loose on Halloween. I've been loathe to hear it so far, since I'm with the crowd who says it's blasphemy to call it a Bat Out of Hell record without Steinman producing, even if he wrote half of the songs on it. The song at hand originally appeared on the Pandora's Box record, but you probably know it as a Celine Dion hit from ten years ago. Yeah, I know.

He worked with The Sisters of Mercy, but Jim Steinman is also responsible for Air Supply's "Making Love Out of Nothing at All," plus Bonnie Tyler's "Total Eclipse of the Heart" and "Holding Out for a Hero." Face it, those are all good songs, even though the performers are lame-os. It stands to reason that I liked Meat's version of "Original Sin" better than Taylor Dane's, and I certainly prefer this version of "It's All.." over fucking Celine's. The song is supposedly inspired by "Wuthering Heights," Steinman's attempt at "the most passionate, romantic song" he could muster. I don't know if it's all that, but the melody has plenty of swooning bombast that sounds more sincere here than in both previous versions. Loaf's meaty bellow sells it, although his duet partner, a Norwegian pop/rock star named Marion Raven, is your typical anonymous pop diva. As for the tragic ghost girl video, it's tailor-made for every velvet-cloaked Disney fanatic MILF that bought the record the day it came out. Me, I think this tune is your average Steinman ballad, and thus better than 99% of the other soothing pop you'll hear at the dentist's office. I'm still not sold on Bat III, though, especially when I know the other half of the disc was largely penned by Desmond Child, the tool who created "The Thong Song" and decisively ruined Alice Cooper and Aerosmith by ushering in their power ballad phases. Nikki Sixx and Diane Warren are also among the credited songwriters. Ugh.
Verdict: Better than Celine Dion, but what does that mean?


Cradle of Filth: "Temptation" - This year's Americanized Euro gothic metal trend appears to be '80s synth-pop covers. First, Lacuna Coil released Depeche Mode's "Enjoy the Silence" as a single (which, humorously, It Dies Today already did last year), and now here's Cradle of Filth with a rendition of Heaven 17's "Temptation." This one is far more ludicrous, and it manages to make the previously reviewed Meat Loaf video look like a paragon of classy goth appropriation. First of all, what the hell is wrong with Dave Pybus? The bassist, one of two "band members" Dani Filth has stolen from Anathema over the years, seemed like he'd gotten a whiff of integrity when he jumped from the Cradle last year. Yet bills must have been pouring in, since he got back on board before the recording of the band's controversial new album, the admittedly well-titled Thornography. From what I've surmised from reviews, Dani and his dandies are now completely playing to their new crowd of Hot Topic goth-wannabe cheerleaders and their horny jock boyfriends. I saw this coming some time ago, around the time when AFI completely wussed out and people began to take poseurs like My Chemical Romance and Atreyu seriously, but I was somewhat impressed when Nymphetamine, Cradle's last disc, surprisingly contained some of the most sonically aggressive (although certainly not best) material in the band's history. That was apparently a fluke. By all accounts, the new one is mostly midpaced, the once-florid guitar riffs are largely bland rhythmic stabs and Dani is attempting some of the lousiest big-name metal singing this side of In Flames' warbly Anders Fridén, those constipated-sounding fucktards from Disturbed and Avenged Sevenfold or even that Backstreet Boys-sounding fucktard from Linkin Park. Meanwhile, elsewhere in England, the still-great Cavanagh brothers are without a label and reduced to begging for PayPal contributions from their MySpace friends while releasing free downloads of impressive home recordings on the Anathema web site. Dave Pybus, did you contribute?

And what the fuck is Sarah Jezebel Deva still hanging around for, other than a paycheck? The big single from Nymphetamine, its title track, was a ballad wherein Dani split his croaky vocals with former Theatre of Tragedy siren Liv Kristine. For this "Temptation" cover, they got another female guest vocalist, some obscure cheesy rocker chick named Dirty Harry. Sure, these guest blondes look hotter slinking around in the videos, but on the rest of the album the witchy cooing comes from Sarah, an enduring inspiration to every chubby goth girl on the planet. I think this is an insulting trend, and Sarah should just focus on her new band Angtoria, which has been getting good reviews. Anyway, this promo clip from the current Cradle output has some sort of Garden of Eden theme, with Dani and that Harry dame alternately lounging in a bright field or performing with the band in rain or snow. I suppose he's Adam, and she's Lilith? The song is horrible, easily the worst Cradle cover I've ever heard (their Sisters of Mercy cover was so good!). Harry reminds me of some Christina Aguilera acolyte, and she makes an already lousy track even lousier. The Cradle machine is obviously hoping the HIM crowd will be charmed by its cock rock beat and dumb chorus, which begs the question why they didn't just release the new song "The Byronic Man" as a single instead, as it actually has a guest vocal spot by HIM cheeseball Ville Valo. I'll tell you something. A few weeks ago, I saw Moonspell for about ten minutes when they played after Katatonia. They were really corny, but you know what? Their new single is way better than this.
Verdict: The other track I've heard from Thornography sucks, too.


Lady Sovereign: "Random" - At first, I was skeptical about Lady Sov. She came up through the UK grime scene, which I could never really get into. Some of the music isn't bad, and some of the bigger names (Dizzee Rascal, Kano, Lady Sovereign) are unique MCs, but the garishly adorned, afterhours club hopping, champagne-and-cocaine-bender vibe of the stuff generally turns me off. The 1980s are crawling back to life in just about every corner of popular music these days. While golden age hip-hop values are still observed in young crews focusing on solid beats and meaningful rhymes, there's something very '80s about the jarring, hedonistic flow of grime, and I mean '80s in a neon, Reagan sort of way. I'm certainly interested in a hybrid of hip-hop and electronic music, as I love outfits like Cannibal Ox and Dälek. But right there, I reveal my backpack, as well as my party-time preference toward relaxing rather than maxing. I don't fucking dance, I don't even mosh anymore. Grime is, first and foremost, dance music, the kind to which you can actually dance. Lady Sovereign, who is not even 21 yet and comes off like a brattier Sporty Spice, rose quickly through its ranks. Her debut LP, a collection af previously released singles and new cuts, came out a few weeks ago under the new Jay-Z Administration at Def Jam. I wasn't very impressed by her noisy, late-arriving set at Lollapalooza this summer, especially since she was drowning out Iron & Wine. She also managed to score slots at Coachella, Bumbershoot, Intonation and probably a number of other major American summer festivals, too, well before her album was even released here. It just smelled too pre-fab to me.

However, I was surprised to find her growing on me. Some time ago, I linked to a Chocolate Industries sampler produced in association with Adult Swim, from which I first heard heard her on record. It included her single "Hoodie," remixed as some sort of spastic meth freak-out by the obnoxiously juvenile Spank Rock. Through the hyper clatter, you can hear that she's got style. See, the thing with Lady Sov is that unlike a lot of American rappers on major labels, she actually grew up in public housing. Ali G is a parody of wannabe British ghetto kids, Lady Sovereign is a British ghetto kid. In London, it's actually not so cool to be economically strapped. The lower-income youth culture that sprung up there is sort of a cross between working-class pride and ruling-class envy, and the kids like Lady Sovereign are sneered at like the squatter punks of old. The regular version of "Hoodie," her answer to the chav-haters, is better than what Spank Rock did to it. "Random" was her breakthrough single from last year, and it's equally cool. Her accent and slang are sometimes so thick she sounds completely drunk, yet she turns some quick verbal corners before settling into a cockily chirpy chorus. I get the feeling that Lady Sovereign is looked at as a grime sell-out because her songs are very poppy despite her ramshackle image (she's no ODB), and her video's pretty slick. But if Lady Sovereign is a marketing tool, she seems like a smart one.
Verdict: Fad, innovator... whatever, that girl is cute as hell.


Muse: "Knights of Cydonia" - Muse is a pretty huge alt.rock institution in Europe, and like Placebo, they're getting big over here, too. Their new Black Holes and Revelations was my first exposure to the British trio, and it's a pretty cool album. Every song sounds different - it has big ol' rockers, trippy prog-lite, lighter-hoisting ballads, some of that herky-jerky '80s art-punk stuff the kids are into these days, the works. Frontman Matt Bellamy's got a very U.K. sensibility: ultra-romantic, kind of mopey, kind of snarky. Muse does some pretty smart things within the standard radio rock format. The only downside to the record is that some of its "soaring" atmosphere reminds me of U2, and while I can handle the musical aspect of that comparison, it's Bellamy's occasional vocal resemblance to Bono that bugs me. Bono gets on my nerves. I'm fucking sick of him and his lounge singing and his stupid wardrobe and his philanthropic missions and his pretensions of relevance. Thankfully, Bellamy has other tricks (he likes the falsetto) and influences, too, as one run through the new album may alternately remind you of Queen, The Cure or Radiohead. Don't know about their older discs yet, but for fans of Britrock through the ages, this one's a keeper.

"Knights," the last song on the album, was picked as the first American single from Black Holes, whereas the Brits got the electro-tinged "Supermassive Black Hole" and the stadium-ready "Starlight" on their national playlists prior to this. Good marketing, because as an American, I liked "Knights" the best upon first listen. While I said all the Black Holes tracks sound different, this one is the biggest departure from the rest of the album, a space/surf/hard rock anthem that's catchy as all get out. The tone of the tune is very retro, oversized and campy, although it's easily separated from the self-consciously ironic crap you get from The Darkness or The Eagles of Death Metal considering the ten tracks preceding it. Muse also switches gears completely about halfway through the song, from an amiable sort of Iron Maiden gallop to pure Zeppelin brontosaurus riffery. Such a dramatic change in tempo and melody is not a common trait for a song you can hear on mainstream American radio, but one which charms my prog-loving heart. All of this mixing and matching translates well to the "Knights" video, cheekily fashioned to look like the coolest vintage European exploitation movie ever. Who wouldn't want to see a kung fu sci-fi spaghetti western? It's an appropriately fun way to advertise the song, and a great little piece of pop art in its own right.
Verdict: Easily the best music video I've seen all year.


Deicide: "Homage for Satan" - Recently, it was publicly alleged that I am some sort of Deicide fan. That steamed me, not just because it came out of someone who had ample evidence to understand that the opposite is true. I am admittedly very snobby about my musical tastes, and due to the implications, I consider saying that I like Deicide to be slanderous. Sure, some intelligent people enjoy Deicide. The band has influenced plenty of other good bands. But to me, they are the epitome of knuckle-dragging, petulant, shock tactic, lowest common denominator death metal for immature vandals. Deicide generally attracts the same trailer park bad-asses who delight in parking lot brawls, large amounts of cheap beer, giving their mom the finger on daytime talk shows and KKK rallies. Unless they play an instrument, whenever someone tells me they're a big Deicide fan, I tend to regard them differently. However, I will qualify this stance by admitting they're better than ever right now. See, after many years of throwing tantrums for SATAAAAN, in 2003 vocalist/bassist/lunatic Glen Benton was drafted to growl and screech on an album by technically prodigious underground favorites Vital Remains. The result, Dechristianize, was the best recording in which Benton had ever taken part, and the next Deicide album showed signs of the VR record rubbing off on drummer/main songwriter Steve Asheim, mainly in a sudden abundance of melodic guitar work. The songs were still given intellectual titles such as "Go Now Your Lord Is Dead," "Fuck Your God" and - the funniest Deicide song moniker ever - "Mad at God." But the music was, if not amazing, at least more listenable. Their first for the venerable Earache Records, it was (over)hyped as the band's comeback after several widely-hated slabs of sub-Six Feet Under groove/death, albums largely seen then and now as Benton's eeeevil way of saying "eff you" to Roadrunner Records for neglecting Deicide while ditching the rest of its pioneering death metal roster to make room for bullshit nü-metal pro wrestling soundtrack fodder like Coal Chamber and Slipknot.

Then the band had its first line-up change ever, with the steroid freak Hoffman brothers replaced on guitars by Ralph Santolla and Jack Owen, the former a onetime touring axeman for the likes of Death and Iced Earth, the latter a guy I interviewed back when he was in Cannibal Corpse. These guys make all the difference, as the recent Deicide disc, The Stench of Redemption, is okay. It's no scratch on what bands like Vital Remains or Arsis are doing with intense melodic death in the States today, but it's also not what I've historically thought of when I think of Deicide. This video for the typically-titled "Homage for Satan," though? Exactly what I've historically thought of when I think of Deicide. Some "28 Days Later" zombie monster dude is stumbling around drooling blood! Eek, he turns the little kid into a zombie monster, right in front of his parents! Then the kid turns a bum into one of them, and the bum chases a priest who runs like a little nancy boy! The priest turns into a zombie monster and preaches to all the other zombie monsters! He gets blood on the Bible! Of course, it's comic book Satanism at its basest. Unimaginative blasphemic imagery with no context can only impress angry kids with really religious parents. For anyone older than 18, this silly shit cannot hold a red candle to the more thoughtful - yet no less venomous - critiques of religion offered by The Meads of Asphodel or Deathspell Omega. But I'll admit the solos by Santolla and Owen are pretty wicked, and I'll bet a lot of old Deicide fans don't like all that fruity melody shit messing up the growlfest, which makes me smile.
Verdict: Better, but I still can't say I like 'em, and you shouldn't say I do, either.


Hammers of Misfortune: "Trot Out the Dead" - Just as I was about to post this sucker, I realized there are two metal videos in this entry, and I sandbagged both of them. So as not to seem down on the whole scene, here's an example of what makes the music compelling to me today. This is not an *official* promo video, nor can it be found outside of YouTube. It is a b/w bootleg of one of America's best metal bands playing in a sweaty little bar a few years ago. The new Hammers of Misfortune record, The Locust Years (awesome title track now playing at number eight waaaaay up on the right), is not as jaw-dropping as their previous The August Engine is, but it's nonetheless an impeccably crafted piece of genre-smashing work. Guitarist John Cobbett, aside from being a hell of a nice guy, is very smart, very creative, very open-minded and very metal. This is my favorite combination for a musician. He says he doesn't like videos because they can destroy the mystique of a good song, and that makes sense. "Trot Out the Dead" would be the obvious choice for a Locust single due to its infectious energy and brevity. Because of its lyrics, the best criticism of the Bush administration I have yet to hear in song, I'm sure a video director would be tempted to have actors in suits drinking blood over a schematic of the World Trade Center towers or something. That would be lame. This bootleg was done well before the song was recorded. The camera work is static, Mike Scalzi's voice doesn't sound like it's in great shape and keyboardist/vocalist Sigrid Sheie is heard but never seen. However, this is the lineup that made the album... Scalzi and the rhythm section have all since departed, so unless you are as cool as me and caught the tour during which this was filmed, this is the closest you'll ever come to seeing 'em. This is the closest thing there will be to a video from this album, as well, so enjoy the raw, homemade goodness.
Verdict: Jamie Myers, I miss you already.